She Seems Neurotypical, But Is She Masking? Understanding Autism in Girls

When most people think about autism, they tend to imagine the more commonly recognized traits such as challenges with eye contact, repetitive behaviors, or difficulty with social situations. But autism doesn’t always present the same way in every individual. In fact, many girls are often overlooked or misdiagnosed because their traits can be quieter, more internal, and not what most people have been taught to look for. 

From a young age, many autistic girls learn to blend in by copying how others speak, act, or interact. This effort to fit in socially is called masking, and while it may help them avoid standing out, it often leads to emotional exhaustion and a feeling of not truly being seen or understood. These girls may be described as polite, quiet, or eager to help,traits that can mask significant inner struggles. Instead of acting out, they may internalize distress, which can eventually show up as anxiety, depression, or emotional shutdowns. 

Strong interests are another area where autistic traits can be missed. While boys on the spectrum might be deeply focused on topics like trains or technology, girls often develop equally intense interests in areas that are more socially accepted, like animals, books, or celebrities. Because these interests don’t seem unusual, the depth of their focus often goes unnoticed. Socially, they may work hard to maintain friendships but feel confused by the subtle expectations and shifting dynamics. Even if they’re included in social groups, many report feeling like outsiders or struggling to fully connect. When these signs are missed, many girls grow up believing something is wrong with them without understanding why. 

At Brightside Behavioral Health, we believe that recognizing autism in all its forms is key to offering meaningful support. Our team of therapists understands the unique ways autism can show up in girls, teens, and women, and we’re here to help each client feel understood, supported, and empowered. Whether you’re looking for therapy for your child, or support as an autistic adult, our clinicians are here to help. 

We provide both in person and telehealth counseling across Rhode Island and Massachusetts, with offices located in Johnston, Cranston, and Warwick. This April, in honor of Autism Awareness Month, our blog will feature posts focused on promoting autism understanding, acceptance, and support. We’re proud to be part of a community that values neurodiversity and is open to learning more. Follow along as we continue to share resources and insights aimed at uplifting and educating the communities we serve.